The clock ticks. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. In my dreamlike state, I have all the time in the world. Deadlines are elusive. Time and space are my friends, not my enemy. I am not a docent nor do I pretend to understand the meanings behind surrealism, yet I relate.
I am a scholar. Well, an emerging scholar. The clock ticks relentlessly in my second year as a PhD student. I am a doctoral student who works full time. I am an emerging researcher who has five children, dance schedules, Navy graduations, college campus visits, senior prom dress shopping, and homework. Kid homework. My homework. And housework. The second hand meticulously repeats the chorus,”assignments…assignments.” With each passing minute, the cadence remains the same yet the lyrics morph into, “deadlines…deadlines.”
I have a goal. I desire publication. Not for recognition. Not for accolades. I simply want to start to enter into the conversation. In order to “talk”, I must “write”. But time is not my friend. Home. School. Family. Work. Tick tock.
I recall attending a Franklin Covey training on time management many years ago. The presenter asked us to raise our hands if we were hoping to learn time management techniques. We all eagerly raised our new leather bound planners while our wallets were about $350.00 lighter. The presenter knowingly baited us and then stated “Well you are in the wrong training!” We were quite confused.
But then, in Covey fashion, the presenter went on to explain a concept which has stuck with me throughout my career as a professional and now a 50 year old returning grad student. You see, we were told, you cannot manage time. We all have the same amount of time each day. The same second hand ticks for us all. The same amount of sand sifts through the hourglass (these are the days of our lives, yes I am THAT old.) We CANNOT manage time. Tick Tock. We CAN manage events. Instead of a time management workshop, we actually signed up for an event management workshop. We learned strategies for prioritizing, inboxing, outboxing, list making, and list checking. Of course, some days are much more productive than others but one has to decide if the goal of life is to check of many tasks or complete a few…really well. (That is a debate for another blog).
Tonight, I sit at my computer and prepare to write my first scholarly article. My deadline is Friday, February 21. Tick tock. I am acutely aware that the clock reads 9:39 PM on Monday, February, 17. I also realize that I am blogging instead of writing my article. This is not avoidance behavior. Tick tock. This is not procrastination. Tick tock. This is an intentional strategy to manage my events, not the clock. Blogging helps me think creatively. Blogging helps me consider how I find the flow of my writing.
I am not sure if my article will be accepted. I am not sure if my article will be rejected. But despite the uncertainty, I also know that I am sure that I am ready to enter the world of scholarly conversation.
My time is here.
My time is now.
Wish me luck…and a little bit more time to get it done!